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I am Definitely Still a Girl…

Ok, I realize that the title of this post is TOTALLY strange, but I promise it will eventually make sense. Today, as I was ordering Christmas cards to send out (my first time EVER doing this), I realized that I almost feel like an adult. However, I still do NOT feel like I am a “woman.” I definitely still refer to myself as a “girl.” The fact that I play with play-do three times a week and still buy shirts at the Target kids department probably doesn’t help the situation…. However, in talking with my Mumsie, we decided that upon having my first baby I may be able to embrace the whole “womanhood” thing. Thoughts?


However, it got me thinking about adulthood and if I feel like I consider myself a true “adult.” I have been recalling the pivotal moments where I felt like I have come one step closer to adulthood:

1)      Driving:

(Aww, this is exactly what Vinny, my first car looked like!)

Although any and every 16-year-old can drive, I remember the first time I drove in a car ALONE. Holy Goodness, I felt like I was 30 years-old and so stinking independent.


2)      Navigating airports by myself:


I went to college 10 hours away from home, so beginning with a hurricane my freshman year, I became very familiar with doing the whole airport thing by myself. I know some people are probably thinking—“Big Wow.” But I am the youngest child, so I think doing things by myself feels more pivotal. Also, I have the worst sense of direction and can get lost ANYWHERE, so actually successful maneuvering throughout the Chicago airport is a VERY big deal.


3)      Getting Married:

You would think that this would have sealed the adulthood deal—but it totally did not. I was 22 years-old when I got married. I was going into graduate school (so I was still a student), so in actuality I felt more like I was playing house than legitimately becoming an adult. Even now, after being married for 4 years, I still sometimes forget my married name. (Awkward).  Also, I think living in an apartment (a 1 bedroom/1 bathroom apartment, at that) has reinforced the whole “playing house” mentality. Chase had dorm-rooms bigger than our apartment. Perhaps buying our first house will make adulthood seem more real.


4)      Staying at a hotel alone:

I actually just recently accomplished this feat, thanks to the great power outage of 2011. It. Felt. Strange. Even though I was in the same town I live in, I felt strangely vulnerable—grown-up, but not completely an adult. When they asked for my credit card and ID I felt oddly self-conscious. Bizarre, but true.


5)      Buying a couch:

Up until this year, Chase and I had never actually spent more than $100 on furniture. I always joked that we could very easily get a divorce, as we had no investments, property, pets, or children. However, after literally 4 months of shopping, we made our first $1000 purchase. We were officially in it for the long haul. Walking into that furniture store and actually picking fabric and paying for a couch on the spot TOTALLY made me feel both more grown-up and married. (P.S. Chase, In the event of the tragic dissolution of our marriage, I will totally fight you tooth and nail to get custody of this couch. Thank you! Love you!)



What about you? What experiences have made you feel like an adult?


About paleorunnergirl

I am obsessed with cooking, running and reading! I teach American Literature at the college level, but enjoy books of all kind! After years of GI issues and being prescribed numerous medications, I found perfection in eating Paleo! I am no longer bloated, nauseous, or miserable on a daily basis. I have delved into creating Paleo recipe-making and embracing an active and playful life!

31 responses »

  1. I still feel like a girl too! Which is weird since I’m married and expecting my first child… so guessing that change will happen when my baby is born LOL. We’ll see though!

  2. I still don’t feel like an adult either! My dad tells a story that he didn’t feel like a dad until I was 3(!) when fell and hurt myself bad enough to have to go to the doctor and get stitches.

  3. Oh my goodness I do NOT feel like an adult… being a kid is way better 🙂 I agree on the airport one!

  4. Oh girlfriend – I know the feeling. There is some expression that ‘inside every old person is 18 year old wondering what the heck happened’. For the longest time I felt like I was ‘playing at being grown up’ – a few years ago (I’m 29 now) I realised that is actually what all adults are doing! I love your posts! xox

    • You are totally right, I think everyone, deep down, feels a bit like an imposter–it’s just that adults are GREAT at pretending its not an act! 🙂 I think I am slowly realizing that I am officially grown-up!

  5. I remember this moment as distinctly as I remember my name. It was on Feb. 11, 1986…..when I was bringing home my SECOND child from the hospital. It hit at that very moment that I was no longer “playing adult”, I WAS an adult. I realized that I had 2 tiny children (age 2 and newborn) who 100% relied upon me for their life. I knew then there could never be another day in my life where I could “choose” to be a child I realized by doing so would harm them…..that was daunting!!! EGADS……

  6. I totally get what you are saying! I think my first day as a PA will definitely make me feel like an adult. My problem is I still LOOK like a kid!! Patients ask me all the time how old I am!

  7. I feel you on the airport thing!! I should be such a PRO from travelling back and forth to the DR & going through international customs all the time, but I’m still such a baby about travelling alone. And I feel more like I’m “just playing” in my 1-bedroom too. Ah life. I totally still claim girl too. Might as well savor it will it lasts! 🙂

  8. I’ve had so many of these moments over the past few years but especially this year. Lots has changed with my family and I have had to be almost entirely independent about everything since. It’s tough but it’s forcing me to learn very valuable lessons too!

  9. Ohh this post hits way too close to home…. What makes me feel like an adult- getting married, moving to New York to live, Buying a house, paying insurance, trying to have kiddos of our own, turning 25, geeze the list could go on and on and on…

  10. Going to the car dealership alone made me feel like an adult (well, technically Natalie came with me, but still….). It’s silly, but I feel like anything having to do with my car has always been my dad’s responsibility!

    • Oh. My, Gosh. I totally agree! When Chase and I went to look at cars I felt like a child! I kept expecting them to ask if my mom was coming! And anything related to the car ALWAYS makes me feel adult-ish.

  11. Oh we will always feel like a little girl inside and

    sometimes act like one especially when we are around the people we love the most.

    And its a wonderful feeling.

  12. I felt like an adult when one month I couldn’t meet my bills and my parents would no longer help. Being financially responsible for everything I have made me feel like an adult, and fast.

  13. I think I’ve always felt like an adult because my parents weren’t around too terribly much from middle school on, but the things that sealed the deal (in no particular order)
    1) living alone in a house that’s over 4 hours from the nearest family member
    2) having two major surgeries without any family nearby
    3) spending Christmas and Thanksgiving alone due to work obligations
    4) Renting a car when traveling.
    5) Realizing I needed to get a credit card to build credit
    6) Writing checks for bills

  14. I bounce between the two! I was in post secondary for 8 years so I didn’t feel quite grown up being a student! Even though I have been married for 4.5 years, owned a home for 6.5 years, been graduated for 1.5 years and a mother for 1, I still don’t know that I truly feel like an adult!

  15. Great post! I feel like a “girl” too, especially when I’m at school and the lunch ladies confuse me for one of the students. Oh geez! What has made me feel like an adult was getting my own place, later having my boyfriend move in, and then getting engaged. Now if I could just figure out how to wear makeup…. 😉


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